It's 4am and I just said "goodbye" to my husband for the second time in a month. Mid and Dick are driving him to Cleveland for his appointments. Neither of us slept tonight. I avoided tears by staying busy, helping him get dressed, packing his bag, fussing like I do. I was fine until I kissed him goodbye and he eased himself into their car, watching him try to stay strong as he adjusted the seat to try to make him as comfortable as possible and strap a pillow over his belly to help guard against the bumps. It was then that I realized he was driving 4 hours away to manage an unfair lot in life and I was alone in a cold garage praying a baby stays inside so that his daddy can meet him for the first time with me. It is just too much right now. This hurdle is so small compared to what we've been through but in my current state it is just as tear worthy.
Troy is getting tired. The pain takes him to his limit and if that isn't bad enough there is always a side of humilitation. I love him so much it breaks my heart. I feel like a part of me dies when he starts to give up. All I can do is pray. I pray for his strength, my strength, emotional and physical stamina...I pray when I don't even know the words. As I give up my control to God he gives me peace.......thank you Lord for that peace....maybe now I can get some rest.
Is it too late to take an ambien?